Not Sweating the Small Stuff

Prison Break

A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to find money and guns and finds a young couple in their bedroom in twin beds. He ties them each to a bed. He gets on top of the girl, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes to the bathroom. While he's in there, the husband tells his wife: "Listen, this guy is an escaped convict, look at his clothes!!! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years!! I saw how he kissed your neck! If he wants sex don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you! Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you! This guy is probably very dangerous! If he gets angry he'll kill us!! Be Strong honey, I Love You!!" To which his wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck! He was whispering in my ear!! He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we have any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be Strong Honey, I Love You Too!!!!!!!"